THE BLOG

11
Nov

Regarding very delicious burgers in Melbourne.

Posted by / Food, Travel

I’ve written/sooked before in my Sunday Style column about how people who say, “This is the world’s best burger” are dinguses, because they have not tried every burger in the world, and therefore their opinion is not actually qualified.

So let’s all agree to just say things like, “This burger sure is tasty!” and “Wow! This burger is the best I personally have ever tried!” and “Gosh this burger tastes wonderful, a fact which I’m sure you would agree should you ever sample one of the same!” so that we don’t fall into the very modern dilemma of unsubstantiated hyperbole.

Now, onto great burgers in Melbourne. A subject I never tire of, and nor do my greedy little tastebuds.

I’m not sure if you noticed, but last week those cheeky In-N-Out bastards (In-N-Out, for those unaware, is only available in the USA. Their wares are delicious. Make sure you try said wares when next you’re there. LA is your best chance) did a pop-up for three stupid hours in Melbourne with no warning so pigs like me couldn’t plan and line up like a grease-desperate d-bag. They pulled the same shit in Sydney in 2012. We can only hope these frustrating litmus tests are occurring to ascertain whether they should open a store here permanently. Here’s the answer to that, In-N-Out: Yes. Yes you should.

Shake Shack, who make my absolute favourite burger, have never done pop-ups in Australia, and probably never will. But that’s fine by because it’s a special treat when in NYC, and in a world where everything is rapidly homogenising (we now have Zara, Topshop, Uniqlo and H&M here, something I thought I always wanted, but actually don’t because now shopping overseas is that little bit less special…. that said COS is opening and I fucking LOVE COS, and this makes me take everything I just wrote back.)

ShakeShackShake Shack, you glorious bastards.

Also last week, Broadsheet, that gorgeous bible of tasty eats, published their best burgers in Melbourne list. (Here’s their Sydney one for the NSW cats. My favourite up there is the cheeseburger at The Fish Shop on Potts Point, which used to be on the Lotus menu and which they smartly retained despite changing cuisines and restaurants altogether.)

I don’t agree with some of Broadsheet’s choices, but I REALLY agree with Le Bon Ton’s wagyu burger being on there, which my piggy of a husband and I discovered and subsequently moosed down last week because we felt we deserved a treat since we hadn’t slept for about a month due to our son insisting on having “teeth.”

 

The_Burger_Adventure-LeBonTonLe Bon Ton’s masterpiece.
(Pic from The Burger Adventure a site I, as a burger rat, like to visit.)

Le Bon Ton’s is my new most loved Melbourne burger, an honour previously held by Belles Diner in Fitzroy, which no longer exists, because it’s now Belles Hot Chicken.

Try it if you can.

Also try unicycling if you can, but don’t be afraid to give up if it’s too hard.

 

 

 

Responses to this drivel: 10 Comments
03
Nov

When one facial isn’t enough.

Posted by / Beauty, Skin, Spa + Salon

Occurred to me the other day, as I thoroughly (oh-man-you-can’t-believe-how-much) enjoyed a delicious, skin nourishing Sodashi facial at Made. Beauty Space in Hawthorn, that I sometimes just talk about the strong facial treatments I have, and fail to mention the other ones, which are a lot more traditional and enjoyable, but no less important.

In an ideal world, a world where we had wash-n-go hair that always looked immaculate and we never needed to wax and our manicures and pedicures lasted for six months, we would make time for both kind of facial. Because while both are helpful and useful for the skin independently, together they are like some form of magical skin superhero. One does the heavy lifting, the ugly stuff, grunting and causing discomfort with a terribly cliche no pain no gain attitude; the other coming in with a lovely soft blanket, some white chocolate cheesecake, a huge glass of hydrating coconut water and a little kiss on the forehead. (Neither facial should ever be like this.)

The Hardcore One

This one is important because not unlike a tenacious Hollywood manager, it Gets Shit Done and Makes Things Happen. This is where you actively fix your skin problems, usually ove over a program or course and a series of sessions. These are purpose driven treatments. You have targets, like uneven skin tone (pigmentation) or acne, or thick, oily skin, or dry, lined skin, and you fire with things like strong peels, IPL, LED, lasers, microdermabrasion and so on. These are not pleasant treatments. In fact they generally sting or hurt quite a lot. But man do they get results. Do not expect to float out of the clinic or salon on a high, expect to leave laden with after care products and skin care that will maintain and amplify the effects of the treatment.

When to have them: To make dramatic changes to the quality/look/state of your skin. Before a big event (wedding etc). To refresh and boost the appearance of your skin.

The Lovely One

You know this one. Mood lighting. Three deep breathes before we start. Lovely soft music. Steamer. Extractions. Lovely long facial massage. Thick (sometimes thermal, sometimes cold, sometimes stingy, sometimes claustrophobic and rock hard – depends what your facialist determines your skin needs) masks followed by a hydrating mask, a foot and arm massage and a spritz of rose facial mist before a pixie flies in and rings a tiny pixie bell to signal the treatment is over. You leave smelling like a fancy hippie and in danger of being hit by a car because you are in a state of outrageous bliss, and seriously consider having a little nap in the car. These facials are excellent for relaxation, deep hydration, revitalisation and nourishment for the skin.

When to have them: Ideally, you would have one every 4-6 weeks for maintenance, to clean out blackheads, to ‘feed’ and revitalise the skin, and boost what you’re doing at home.

Of course, plenty of salons and clinics offer both kind of facial, but I personally choose to go to different people/places with different skill sets and allow them to do what they do best.

One way to think of it is the same way as you do your serums…  One should be a problem-solver, an active, concentrated, targeted results-getter, (this is used first, on clean skin, by the way) and the other should be nourishing, comforting and hydrating, like a gorgeous facial oil, say (this goes on just before your face cream). Together they work to make your skin as good as it can be, but in different ways.

Where I go: In Melbourne I recommend Brooke at Me Skin and Body and like neoSKIN in Richmond for the hardcore stuff, and Made Beauty Space for the lovely, peaceful, relaxing one.

MADEBSMADE. beauty space

In Sydney, I see my gorgeous, magical Natasha – 0422 650 773 – in Double Bay for my lovely facials, and the insanely elegant Jocelyn Petroni for my peels and Omnilux etc… although she is also fantastic at the lovely ones. The Clinic in Bondi Junction is also a go-to for my hardcore stuff… peels but also laser hair removal etc).

Jocelyn-Petroni-vogue-picJoceyln Petroni. Cute as a dang button.

Where do you go for your hardcore or lovely treatments?

Just kidding, I already know! Been following you on Twittinstabook for years.

 

Responses to this drivel: 12 Comments
05
Sep

Skin care I’m packing for a summer holiday.

Posted by / Beauty, Skin, Travel

Next week I am off Greece and Italy but NOT Iceland, for those who keep asking.

It will be warm but not violently hot, we will be swimming a lot, and I will eat tonnes of feta. All of this thrills me.

I used to pack 74329 cosmetics and toiletries for these trips;  there would be a bag of face skin care, one for body, one for hair, and one just of makeup. I would take a tong and my ghd, as well as several brushes. And there would STILL be space for one bikini and my passport – amazing!

These days I have streamlined it considerably, in large part due to my own skin care line being so dang perfectly useful (which is why I made it), and having a baby whose accoutrements soak up most of my packing space.

So here’s the skin care I’m taking because it’s:

A) useful information for those wishing to protect and look after their skin while travelling to warm climes,

B) pervy knowing what other people use,

C) a wonderful way to extoll the virtues of a well-curated toiletries bag, and

D) less stressful than actually packing them.

 

So! We have…

1 x Go-To Properly Clean cleanser cos it takes off all my makeup and sunblock real good. One full bottle will get me around 30 days.

Go-Properly-Clean-2995.jpg1 x SkinCeuticals Phloretin CF antioxidant serum to wear under sunblock each day to help prevent UV damage and premmo ageing. This anti-oxidant step (onto clean skin, first after cleansing) is important. We should all be doing this every day, in my opinion, holidaying or not.

skinceuticals-phloretin-cf

1 x Aspect Pigment Punch pigment prohibiting serum to stop hyperpigmentation before it even really begins, rather than getting smashed by it and working on it doubly hard when I get home. (I will book a lactic peel for the week I get back all the same. I will go to Brooke at Me Skin and Body in South Yarra cos she knows her shit.)

1 x Invisible Zinc SPF 50+ water resistant physical sunscreen to wear on top of serums to thoroughly, physically protect my face and neck, even while swimming. I will make husband wear this every day also. Here are my thoughts on physical vs chemical sun protection.

1 x Go-To Very Useful Face Cream to wear at night because it’s lovely and hydrating and full of antioxidants to heal any UV damage I collected somehow through the day, and halt the free radical damage that occurs for up to 72 hours after sun damage, NOT that I would ever get any of course, cos I am a wild control freak about that and wear big hats to prove it.

1 x Go-To Exfoliating Swipeys… except I am just taking a little stack of them in a re-usable makeup jar for space saving. Being a thorough, chemical exfoliant, this will give my sunscreened skin a deep clean every few days, and you really want that, trust me.

2 x SK-II Facial Treatment masks as well as sample sachets of Elemis Fruit Active Rejuvenating Mask and Dermalogica Skin Hydrating Mask for a hydrating boost every five days or so. Full size tubes and jars of mask are way to big and space thievey for me.

SKIImask

 

I will buy my body sunscreen and body lotion and after sun (full of antioxidants like vitamin E at the least) stuff over there cos they’re way too heavy and space consuming to pack at this end.

Also, I bloody love an overseas pharmacy visit. Last time I was in Mykonos I found a bruise healing cream that, to be crude, defecated all over Hirudoid in terms of effectiveness.

No, I did not bruise myself dancing on tables, how dare you.

I was dancing on a podium obviously.

 

Responses to this drivel: 10 Comments
06
May

The easiest, quickest hair I’ve ever had.

Posted by / Beauty, Hair

Which is what you want just before you bring a teeny human home from the hospital, isn’t it?

YES.

And that’s precisely why I did what I did.

What did I did?

I booked in for the  bhave™ smoothe™ keratin therapy (which is Aussie-made and entirely free of formaldehyde, because the days of keratin smoothing treatments with formaldehyde are OVER) (or really should be) and is a nourishing smoothing treatment for the hair that kicks frizz and tames curls for 2-4 months.

I have tried Another Brand of keratin smoothing previously, which was fine, but after doing an event with the lovely Nikki Parkinson from Styling You in February and hearing her rave about how much she loved bhave, (and she lives in Frizzbane, so she really gets the need for smooth, fast hair) I wanted a go.

Why I did what I did:

Keratin smoothing treatments are well-loved because they give those of us with tricky mops the famed ‘wash and go’ hair we read so much about in magazines and in Disney stories. I want this hair as I head into newborn territory. Very much. And, after two weeks, I can vouch that bhave has made my grooming/hair/appearance approximately 458% easier and swifter. I just wash hair. Dry it off with hair dryer. Use brush if can be bothered. Go. You know, the stuff of godamn dreams.

What’s the process?

I went to the wee little Reveur Cheveux salon in McKinnon where Neil Cleminson – Creative & Technical Director of bhave (a brand also boasting a lovely range of wash and care and styling products – all sulphate and sodium chloride free – as well as the keratin therapy) performed the miracle. It took around three hours all up. I have fine hair, coloured hair, damaged hair, and none of these things mattered. Any hair type can do it.

What happened to my hair?

For the first 48 hours your hair will be REAL flat. That’s cos it’s setting. And you’re not to touch it. It took me back to my days of getting permanent ionic hair straightening (“Japanese straightening”) back in the early 2000s. I was obsessed. Seven hours in a dingy Chinatown salon was nothing to a young squid back then. Hangovers, Snickers and magazines were my faithful companions. It allowed me to have a fringe and hair extensions and all manner of previously ‘straight-hair’ only joy. Was a real shit when it grew out though.. Pube scalp, we affectionately called it.

bhave2

My hair during the ‘setting’ stage of bhave. Highlights suddenly SO light!

As soon as I washed my bhave hair, the flatness racked off. As a fine-haired babe you do wonder if you’ll be left with nothing, but in fact it’s just very silky and smooth. Feels healthy. Happy. Sure, it requires a bit of mousse and blow-drying if I want volume, but to be honest, the quick dry off with a barrel brush does the job for me. And I do mean quick – this is hair that dries in less than five minutes. I love the speed but I also love the obedience.

Also, rain? Whatever. It impacts my hair not one bit. This is a Big Deal for a life-long member of the Frizz Society.

I should mention that my curly hair did go straight with the treatment, (it still has some body, to be fair) but you can request maintaining your wave if you like. (It’s a keratin-infused smoothing treatment after all, not a straightening treatment.) I figure since as the treatment wears off my curls will return anyway, why not go straight, yeah? (Plus, straight, silky hair makes a high ponytail super swishy and cheerleady, a secret hairstyle love of mine.) And I can easily tong in some waves if I want them.

In terms of my colour, it really faded it. I was practically a blonde when I left Neil. That’s why you should wait til your hair needs colouring (and cutting) when you book in for your smoothing treatment. It will just nick all your colour so don’t waste your cash colouring beforehand. Neil recommends waiting at least a week (with two washes in there) before colouring and cutting.

Regarding colouring and cutting:

I was so bloody due for it. Even before I had bhave. So a week after my smoothe treatment, I waddled off to Elliott Steele in Ivanhoe to see Carly, who owns the salon and who is a top dog colourist for OriginalMineral, a company whose salon colour I have loved for a long time. Carly was one of those babes you instantly get along with, and I promise the fact she was also pregnant had nothing to do with it. It felt like I was in a sitcom salon, yknow? Where everyone is warm and having fun and are mates and I’m sure a bottle of wine sneaks out at 5pm each day.

Carly, using O&M’s splendid  CCT (Clean Color Technology, AKA free of ammonia and nasties) went over the top section of my hair with a lovely, cool, ashy dark blonde/light brown semi (I wanted to go a bit darker than usual) and then toned the lighter ends with a slightly lighter shade of the same ashy dark blonde.

ASHY and COOL, as always, are my key words when having my hair coloured. I bloody hate red tones. And if you do too, you’ll never utter the words CHOCOLATE, or WARM or RICH when explaining the kind of brunette you would like to be.

Then Carly  snipped off some ends (a good thing to do after bhave, since the straightness accentuates any splitsies) and quickly blow-dried it (impossible to slowly blow-dry hair that has had bhave) and I was off.

Here’s how it looked the day after. (Hair ALWAYS looks better the second day.)

O&M2

I always look like I just woke up since being pregnant. Cute.

 

Would I recommend it?

Yes. I may only wash my hair twice a week, but the styling and setting of my curly, fine, frizzy, tricky hair that follows (I am a fan of the old-school mousse/blow-dry/tong procedure which then lasts 3-4 days) takes TIME and I have been told roughly 627 times a day that that is one commodity new mums do not have. (As long as we get to eat sashimi, I’m okay with that.)

It’s also great if you’re going off traveling or to a very humid climate (the last time I did keratin smoothing was before living in NYC for summer – a veritable frizz orgy.) Be aware though that if you have very fine hair – as I do – it can last longer than you may like, and your hair can, after a few months, still be lacking in volume.

 bhave™ smoothe™ keratin therapy starts at $199 – cost depends on the length and thickness (which will affect how long it takes.) Click here for some more info.  And click here for some hungover owls.

 

NB: There has been some conflict over whether keratin smoothing treatments (along with, oh, you know, everything) are safe for pregbots, however there is so far no evidence of any adverse effects. Safety came into question because the old formulas were BURSTING with atrocious chemicals and in truth were probably unsafe for any woman, pregnant or not. But formulas have changed. Despite Neil cautiously suggesting I wait until after I’d had the baby (most stylists will, to err on the side of caution/avoid litigation/play it safe, which is far better than them not ) I researched thoroughly, and decided that since bhave is completely free of formaldehyde (as well as any ingredients that break down into formaldehyde) I was fine with it going on my hair. Also, bhave doesn’t flat-iron in the product at a temp that causes fumes and steam – another reason these treatments were to be avoided. Bottom line: it’s completely a personal decision, just like choosing to highlight your hair or having gels on your nails or a glass of pinot once a week or having narcotics in the delivery room or watching far too much One Born Every Minute.

 

Responses to this drivel: 48 Comments
08
Apr

The difference between AHAs and BHAs.

Posted by / Beauty, Skin

Since launching Go-To, and including AHAs in the range, I have had a mountain of questions from dames regarding them, and BHAs, and is the range safe for pregbots and suitable for blemished faces and so on.

So, I thought I would conduct a small, cute lesson on these compounds, both of which WILL make your skin better. Now please pop on your learning beanies or at the very least just skim to the bits that are succinct and dot-pointed so you can get back to filing your nails.

As an introduction, Hydroxy Acids, (which are in both BHA and AHAs) are active skin care ingredients that improve acne and congestion, reduce pigmentation and brighten/even the skin tone,  help reduce discolouration, and reduce the look of wrinkles and fine lines. Plus, they give glow. Lots of lovely glow. 

ALL ABOUT THE BHAs

Starts with a ‘B’ not an ‘A’

Short for Beta Hydroxy Acids, and derived from man-made sources. The most common BHA is salicylic acid, but there is also benzoic acid and buteric acid.

BHAs are the best option for acne, oily skin types, blackheads, blemishes and breakouts. (BHAs don’t have a direct effect on acne bacteria, but they DO clear mild to moderate acne nicely without over drying.)

BHAs’ chief job and skill is deeply cleaning out that nasty oil and build-up in your pores, and limiting the oil on the surface of the skin

Mostly used for clarifying, de-oiling, deep-cleaning the skin, and hugely popular in anti-acne skin care

Oil-soluble (making them terrific for cutting through all that oil and mess in your pores)

Also great at whipping up scrambled eggs for lazy sundays

Less irritating than AHAs

BHAs work best in lower concentrations, so ideally the sally acid should be listed as one of the final ingredients on your product

BHAs are not suitable for pregnant women

BHAs won’t increase sun sensitivity

Use in this order: Cleanser then toner then BHAs then serums then face cream then sunscreen (during the day).

Good BHA prods: Clinique Clarifying Lotion, Mario Badescu Anti-Acne Serum, Dermalogica Clearing Skin Wash, NeoStrata Clear and Smooth anti-blemish pads … which also has some AHAs – not uncommon in acne prods; many combine AHAs with BHAs.

 

Dermalogica Skin Clearing WashClinique Clarifying LotionMario Badescu Anti-Acne Serum

 

AND NOW THE AHAs

Starts with an ‘A’ not a ‘B’

Short for Alpha Hydroxy Acids, AHAs are derived from plant, fruit and milk sugars, and are most commonly: glycolic, lactic, citric and mandalic acids.

AHAs are a chemical exfoliant (as opposed to a physical one, such as a face scrub)

AHAs are excellent for dry, dull, aged or uneven-toned/sun-damaged skin

Will walk the dog if asked nicely

Mostly used for anti-ageing and skin refining due to their excellent exfoliation properties, e.g: their ability to diminish lines and wrinkles, retexture the skin, fade pigmentation and brighten the skin

Water-soluble

AHAs break down the ‘glue’ that holds dead skin cells together, allowing rank, dull, old skin cells to fall off and new, fresh skin cells to come through

Like the good, thorough exfoliant they are, AHAs allow the products you use next (serums, masques, creams) to penetrate better and do a better job.

AHAs can be irritating and cause sensitivity and are definitely stronger than BHAs. Always start off with low doses and usage and build up a tolerance. Or, better yet, play it safe (but still get great results) by sticking to one AHA product, used 3 x a week.

AHAs can turn on you if you’re not careful. Layering AHA products each day and night is stupid and extremely short-sighted. Be careful. I have friends who unknowingly use an AHA serum, cleanser and face cream daily and while their skin looks great today, in a short time, if this level of multi-tiered chemical exfoliation is maintained, skin sensitivity and photosensitivity of the irreversible nature will set in. This is both the beauty and the curse of AHAs… people get addicted to the glow and start to overuse, an altogether terrible idea as your skin has only finite layers and you can’t just exfoliate and exfoliate forever – skin ends up raw and sensitised and prone to rosacea etc etc.

AHAs make your skin sensitive to the sun. If you use AHAS you MUST USE SUNSCREEN EACH DAY. Must! And please try to ensure it is photo-stable also. (So, use a physical/mineral one with zinc oxide or titanium dioxide ideally. And avoid avobenzone, which is not photo-stable.)

Use in this order, and preferably save your AHAs for the PM: cleanser then toner then AHAs then serums then face cream then eye cream.

Some good AHA prods: Alpha-H Liquid Gold, Go-To Exfoliating Swipeys, MD Formulations Facial Cleanser with 12% Glycolic Acid, Olay Regenerist Night Resurfacing Elixir.

 

md-formulations-facial-cleanser-with-glycolic-250mlGo--Exfoliating-Swipeys-50-wipes-4995olay-night resurfacing elixir


Of course, many people use both BHAs and AHAs and that’s perfectly fine (and a lot of products incorporate both, especially skin-clearing products) I just recommend the slowly, slowly, gently gently approach, both when you first dive in, and just always and forever, really.

Responses to this drivel: 47 Comments
01
Apr

Your new favourite skin care line.

Posted by / Beauty, Skin

… Has officially launched!

GoTo_YellowEO copy

 It’s called Go-To, and I created it.
You buy it exclusively from gotoskincare.com, which is now live, and a lot of fun.
We send prods to you fast.
You use and love.
We (telepathically) high-five.
And nearby, a small family of wombats huddle together for a nap.

To celebrate the launch today, I thought I would run you briefly through each of the five products, since I’ve been a bit cagey about them up until now. Knowledge is power, after all! So is money and political status, but that’s less relevant in this situation.

As I have previously pointed out previously, Go-To was designed to be uncomplicated, simple, effective and easy (and fun) to use. Each of these products are useful for all of us, whether we wear a shittonne of skin care and makeup each day, or we just slap on some BB cream and race out the door. Because we all need a cleanser. We all need a moisturiser that will protect our skin from free-radical damage. We all need to exfoliate. We all need a lip balm that actually works. And we all “need” (enjoy?) a multi-purpose oil that can be used everywhere from the heels to the elbows to the nails to the hair to the face.

 THE CLEANSER

Go--Properly-Clean-2995

It’s called Properly Clean, $29.95, because I was sick of cleansers that didn’t do a good enough job. Lazy cleansers. Naughty cleansers. Cleansers that couldn’t keep up with women who used many layers of skin serums and brighteners and primers and so on. They were either too thick and left residue, or they were too foamy and drying, or too scrubby and harsh, and they didn’t nearly remove all the primer/sunscreen/makeup I’d loaded onto my face that day. So, I made one that was as soft and smoothing and lovely on the skin (in use and after being rinsed off) which I think the face demands, but which, because of the Willow Bark Extract (a non-irritating cousin to salicylic acid that ever so gently removes grime and build-up), also actually gets the job DONE and takes care of BIZNEZ.

Fun fact: This was the first product we got right, and my husband loves the shit out of it. And he’s a BOY.

THE EXFOLIANT

Go--Exfoliating-Swipeys-50-wipes-4995

 

Called Exfoliating Swipeys, $45.95, because, well, that’s what they are, these single-use, zingy-smelling little cotton pads take the confusion and error out of exfoliating. Because there’s a lot of that! We either use too many exfoliating products, too often (I have friends who are essentially performing a mini chemical peel each night with all their strong cleansers and  toners and creams), or we don’t do enough, which makes our skin dull and congested and unhappy. The ideal way to exfoliate, in my mind, is softly, thoroughly and regularly. So, I made a solution of gentle AHAs (lactic acid) and hydrating essential oils, and dunked 50 textured pads in it, and now all YOU have to do is swipe one all over your face after cleansing 2-3 times a week, and you’re set.

Fun fact: I was least convinced we had the scent of this right, but have had more positive feedback on this scent than any of the products.

 

THE MOISTURISER

Go--Very-Useful-Face-Cream-3995

 

After a while as a beauty editor, you learn that are a few iconic face creams that remain steadily popular over time. They tend to be very nourishing, but lightweight and quick to sink in. And suitable for even sensitive skins (making them loved by makeup artists to use backstage at shows on models/shoots). I wanted to make one of these all-purpose, lovely creams, because I am arrogant enough to aim that high. BUT. I’m a firm believer that defending and protecting the skin from free radical damage (which come from UV rays, the environment etc), the cause of premature ageing (wrinkles, lines and sun damage), via powerful anti-oxidants is just as important as hydration and the perfect texture. So, I sourced the magical super anti-oxidant, Alma Berry, which has 30x more Vitamin C than oranges (and is anti-inflammatory and super soothing), and popped in some CoQ10, the grand dame of the anti-oxidant world, as well as Vitamin E, so that when you put on Go-To Very Useful Face Cream, $39.95, in the morning (under your physical sunscreen, obviously), you are protected throughout the day, and when you put it on at night, you are working to neutralise any free radical damage you accrued. I love this cream for MANY reasons, including it’s lovely silky texture, fig and rose scent and ability to be worn day, night or mid-flight, but that it’s guarding my skin so thoroughly, well, that’s the bloody clincher.

Fun fact: There is no sunscreen in Very Useful Face Cream because I wanted it to be all-purpose, day/night/flight. I wear a physical sunscreen over it during the day.

 

 THE LIP BALM 

Go--Lips-1495

 

I hardly keep my passion for lip balm under wraps. Am always banging on about how I can’t find the perfect one, or why the one you’re using isn’t working, (petrochemicals, usually) or applauding those that do help my lips… So when I got to make my own, you can bet your bronzer I took it seriously. IT HAS TO BE THE BEST LIP BALM EVER I said to my softly spoken, mild-mannered biochemist. OUR LIP BALM MUST WIN, I reiterated. So, we got to work. Adding all the ingredients I know to actually do something, and which make good lip balms more than just quick-fix barriers. And after just 20 versions, we got there with Lips!, $14.95. It features seven oils, ultra medical grade lanolin, anti-oxidants, butters and beeswax… all bundled up in the perfect formula of creaminess with a pretty sheen and the subtle flavour of pure pomegranate. It’s delicious and I swear by it. So there.

Fun fact: It’s called Lips! because I was so jubilant at having finally landed on the best possible lip balm formula. (In my eyes, anyway. My very bias eyes.)

 

THE MULTI-PURPOSE OIL

Go--Exceptionoil-4995

As a dame who travels quite a lot, and has had to master a smaller toiletries kit than any beauty editor should ever be forced to endure, I know the value of a solid do-it-all prod. Something that can be hauled out and quickly fix rough heels, elbows, cuticles, or soothe and heal little scratches and bites, or hydrate the body, or condition split ends, or add some sheen to foundation, or act as a potent serum (gently dabbed onto the face under face cream – better left to dry, not oily skins). Makes sense then, that I would want to have a crack at making my own… cue Exceptionoil, $49.95. It is SO PURE and so delicious, and with a blend of ten oils and almost as many butters and waxes, the skin bloody loves this balm-oil. (One beauty ed has even said it has sorted out her eczema, so maybe it’s even more magic than we know!) It sinks in fast, leaves no residue, and boasts certified Monoi di Tiare from Tahiti (gardenias macerated in coconut oil) for a – quite frankly – criminally pretty fragrance.

I need to say here that if you DO purchase Exceptionoil, please remember it is an OIL, and needs to be treated as such. In that it might be very runny when you open it, so please be careful. Also, just like that coconut oil you cook with, it will change solidity in accordance to the surrounding temps. (An hour in the fridge will help thicken it if it’s stupidly runny.) And if you travel with it? Like any oil, you should keep it in a plastic ziploc bag.

Fun fact: One customer has been adding a few drops to her bath with truly lovely results and very soft, scented skin. Clever!

… Of course, you can read (and watch) all about the prods in more depth at gotoskincare.com, and see all of the ingredients too, and also all of the things we DON’T put into the products (palm oil, petrochemicals, PEGs, mineral oils, parabens, sulfates, silicones, GMOs, synthetic colours or fragrances, animal testing of any kind).

To all of you who have already purchased your Go-To, and have been kind enough to take the time to let us know how much you are loving the products and packaging on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or Gruzzleplonk,  THANK YOU.

It’s scary launching a skin care line! You’re asking women to put things on their face and telling them their skin will like it, but skin can be so bitchy and so individual, and so you just make it as good as it can be, and you bloody hope for the best. Also! No store! No way for you guys to sniff and play and try the products before buying them – you are just putting blind faith into them and putting them into your virtual cart, and it is THAT leap of faith and trust that I am so deeply grateful for, and promise not to ever mess with.

You’re gorgeous dames, and I bloody adore you. I will shut up Go-To for a while now, promise. Just had to push her out to sea first.

Zo-To x

Ps Go-To and I were on A Current Affair last night!

Responses to this drivel: 64 Comments
26
Mar

Stuff I’m loving, using and doing as a pregbot.

Posted by / Beauty

… Which means this isn’t a strictly beauty post, so a lot of you scoundrels can probably skip it and get back to more important things, like snake-charming and jellybean tasting.

BUT, for those who are interested, I wanted to list some of the things, that as a now quite heavily pregnant dame, I have found useful and great during this somewhat awkward stage of life.

 

WARDROBE


BONDS BRAS.

Bras become a real pain in the tit in pregnancy. Forget all those sweet lacy triangle numbers and even your old reliable t-shirt bras: there are two orbs on your chest that seem to grow more every week, like mutating bacteria, and they are heavy, and they are annoying, and occasionally they are sweaty, and despite your husband’s delight and interest in them, they feel about as sexy as a the business section of the paper. Early on in the piece, when underwire was still feasible and didn’t make me want to throw shit, I loved the Bonds Microfibre Smooth It bra, and now, later on, I love their Maternity Contour Bra, which is a soft cup, but gives impressive enough lift and shape that you can wear it and not feel like the dogs are running all over the yard, all uncontrolled and loose. I also give the odd crop top a nod, but the shape they give is terrible, so it’s just for home wear.

 

BondsMaternityBra

 

NEW BALANCE SNEAKS. WITH ORTHOTICS. AHEM.

Already a fan of NB, and the owner of several fun pairs of 574s, it was a bloody gift when I was told they were probably the best shoe for me to wear daily. My beloved Nike Balanzas and Frees were too unsupportive and bendy, and my Zara trainers and rad Maison Martin Margiela hi-tops (eg, my “dress sneakers”) stopped fitting a while back (due to swelling – cute!), so NB were the unwitting winners anyway. Due to the extra 15 kilos or so I have amassed on my front, my feet were killing me, and I also nabbed plantar fasciitis on my left heel (don’t be jealous) so I saw a podiatrist who put little heel lifts in (I always wanted to be Millhouse) then orthotics to help with the flat foot pain us preggos get. Don’t walk in pain, pregbots. Get your feet sorted and wear the right shoes. Also, wear the right SIZE of shoe: my feet have easily gone up 1.5 sizes, which is real fun and sexy in case you were wondering, so be honest about this, and don’t do what my primary school teacher, Mrs Clegg, did, which is jam your poor feet like stuffin’ in a dang turkey. I also just bought some slip-ons from Seed, in a size that seems enormous for me and yet somehow fits perfectly, because I needed something a bit dressier than bloody trainers, didn’t I? Speaking of Seed…

New Balance 574s


SEED ANYTHING. 

Maternity wear, for those who are yet to stumble down its confusing, bulbous path, is a terrifying world, full of cheap stretchy fabrics and unflattering boob-high waistbands and a complete lack of style in general. I am at a complete loss why some clever bird has not stepped up and created a range that Real Life women will actually wear and like, cos my GOD there is a market. As such, I avoid traditional maternity wear like it has a cold sore and is trying to kiss me. Instead, I go to places like Seed, who do great, normal clothing in very long lengths which means you can easily flip them into maternity gear. This sparkle knit below has been getting a real caning, for example. Country Road is also pretty good. Even Cotton On does a good longy.

 

Seed Sparkle Knit

 

ASOS MATERNITY

I know I just dissed designated maternity wear, but ASOS is the exception. I started buying a few t-shirts and dresses off ASOS back in about my fifth month, when the bump was starting to pop, and have kept on with this trend roughly monthly, when my size changes so much, I need some more dedicated t-shirts and as I bought last round, leggings. YES, LEGGINGS. I know you’re not meant to wear leggings as pants, we all know that, but pregnancy affords special fashion consideration so put those judgy eyes away and show some empathy for ol’ fatty tum here. I also think their dresses are pretty great, for when you need to look glamorous but wish not to spend one million dollars at Zimmerman, which I did do about a month back, because it was fun and I needed a new dress for my baby shower, but you can’t be doing that every week.

ASOS Maternity Asos Maternity Dress Scarf Designasos-grey-asos-maternity

J BRAND MATERNITY JEANS

Oh, what a saviour. As someone who spends far too much money on J Brand jeans in real life, I was thrilled to be able to carry this trend through into preggo life.  I have two pairs of Mama J jeans, one black and casual, and one skinny and blue (for “dressing up” with booties or heels) and they are all I have needed. I found that – amazingly – I had to go down a size from my regular size, so when you’re trying on, keep this in mind. The elastic around the lower tummy will allow the bump to grow nicely, you don’t need to up-size for that. Just pay attention to how they fit on your thighs and arse and work off that. And sure, Beyonce wore Mama Js when she was up duff, whatever, no big deal, it’s not as though I want to be her and do everything she does always!!! And so what if I do.

 

beyonce-mama-j-brand

KOOKAI MERINO WOOL FITTED DRESSES

I discovered these probably a month or two late, but oh, it’s such a dingin’ blessing to have discovered them at all. And look, in full transparency, I probably haven’t set foot in Kookai for about 10 years. But! Very glad I did. Because like those red and white circles at the beach, they certainly are their own brand of life-saver. I am slightly ashamed to admit I have now bought four, (they are $120 each, which I think is actually quite decent considering cost per wear/the fact they are pure wool) BUT I justify that with a book tour and lots of press for the launch of  my skin care range Go-To (ZOMG IT LAUNCHES NEXT WEEK!) and needing to look cute and dressed up when really all you feel like is wearing leggings and trainers and a big old t-shirt. They come in a pile of colours and different cuts, long sleeved, capped sleeves, low V-neck with a high back (I reverse these and get two looks in one dress) and so on, and look, getting to the point, if you are pregnant, I think you should just bloody go buy one. There. I said it. They don’t call me Straighttalkin’ Sally for no reason! Or ever in fact!

BlackKookai RedKookai

SKIN

PIGMENT-CONTROL SERUMS AND GENTLE ACIDS.

Many many pregbots will be gifted with a lovely face of hyper-pigmentation during their 9-10 months of baby-carrying and you can either let it take over, and shrug and watch it slowly buzz off when you have your baby, or you can keep a lid on it, and control it, and save a lot more work at the other end. I use either Aspect Extreme-C, Aspect Pigment Punch or SkinCeuticals Pigment Regulator of a morning, under my face cream and/or physical sunscreen, then again at night. (I layer another serum on for hydration, as I mentioned in this serum layering post.) Also, I exfoluate with AHAs 2-3 times a week, using Go-To Exfoliating Swipeys, of course. And once a month, I go have a full-strength salon peel with either lactic or glycolic acid. This has been working. The pigmentation is still there but it is scattered, rather than clustered and deep, and my facialist totally gave me a scratch and sniff strawberry sticker last week for good work so I’m doing alright I reckon.

** Remember – the most crucial thing when you’re doing all this preventative pigment work and using acids is SUNSCREEN. And please make it a physical one. Many thanks.

PregnancyPigmentation

 

STRETCH-MARK PREVENTION

I’m not going to pretend a few creams will save your arse (literally) from stretch-marks, because a lot of it is genetic, BUT, you should definitely do your best to keep that skin supple and elastic so that it can grow without pulling and tearing. It just makes sense. I have talked about what I’ve used previously and am still keeping up with that, although I can now reveal the body balm-oil I am using is my very own Go-To Exceptionoil, which, when warmed up between the hands and slathered on to the boobs, thighs or mega tum is delightfully nourishing and silky.

 

HEALTH

MAGNESIUM POWDER

Terrific for sore joints, pelvis, back aches, calves etc… I skull a glass each day, and believe it has definitely made things better. I’m not sure if it helps with my swollen, sore, unbendy fingers and my enticing fat feet, or if anything can, but I remain hopeful.

SOLIDEA MATERNITY COMPRESSION SHORTS

These are kiiiiind of like Spanx, only they really are not, because there is nothing tight around the belly, just a lovely big pocket. No, these shorts are all about support of the pelvis, back and thighs, and circulation. They are not shapewear. I got mine at the physio and have worn them to DEATH. Especially when doing a lot of walking around or if I need to wear heels, because I like the tightness and the support. As a bonus, they are lovely and smoothing, and so are excellent under tight clothes, like my Kookai dresses. That they are called ‘Panty Maman’ is just a bonus, really.

Solidea Maternity Support Shorts

 A CLEAN DIET

Pretty obvious when you are trying to grow a human. Although my clean diet is not entirely out of choice, I’m afraid. I have gestational diabetes, so have to be very careful about what and when I eat. (And take my blood glucose levels after every meal, which isn’t at all annoying.) As you all know, gelato is pretty much one of my food groups so this has all been a bit of a blow to ol’ Messina Mary. BUT! On the positive side, I am now a total health cat, and little Schrumpet won’t be overweight and a potential diabetic later in life, so it’s a huge win, really. Plus, there are, like, sugar free Snickers recipes out there now, so all is not lost.

PREGNANCY PILATES AND SPIN CLASS

My body has a leeeettle bit carked it in the last few months, a pelvis issue means I can’t do my beloved walking, so in order not to become a complete lounge lizard, I found a great place (Fitwise Physiotherapy in East Melbourne) that does clinical pilates (with lots of attention paid to the all-important pelvic floor muscles) and a pregnancy spin class, which is zero resistance and possible for even the heavily pregnant and ‘pelvic impaired’ like me. Swimming, you say? Yes. Everyone is like, “swim, do swimming, what about swimming” but I hate swimming, I’m shit at it, it’s too much effort with all the hair washing and styling required afterwards, and the pelvic issue means I can’t do half the leg actions anyway, I can only walk in the water. Which yes, is fine and I probably should do, but haven’t found time as yet. GET OFF MY BACK WILL YOU, I WILL DO IT. Gosh. And not one bloody word about yoga either, thank you very much. I’m aware of it. I know it exists. I know I should do it. Shhhh.

MASSAGE AND REFLEXOLOGY

Since I’m not really blowing a tonne of cash on cute shoes and cocktails, I spend my treat cash on massages and reflexology where possible. Designated preggo massages are fine, (the one at QT hotel in Sydney is outSTANDING) but they can be a bit hit and miss. I use a qualified sports physio massage therapist who is trained in preggo massage instead, cos she goes very hard and deep and doesn’t pussyfoot around the glutes and pelvis and calves and feet which are really, really fucking sore, actually, and deserve every second of the pummelling they get.

PREGGO PILLOWS

My darling husband saw/felt/couldn’t sleep either because I was having a shitty time sleeping and bought me one of those enormous, U-shaped pregnancy pillows to try and help, but sadly I found it claustrophobic and too hot and it now sits sadly at the end of the bed, looking at me hopefully each time I go to bed. What I DO love, though, is the Bellybean, which is low and soft, and sits perfectly either vertically, between your knees and under your tummy, or horizontally, supporting your back and your belly. Big fan. Lovely pillow. Five golden beans.

 

Bellybean

 

Okay that’s absolutely enough. I’m bored so I can only imagine how bored YOU are.

If I think of anything else I will update.

If you have any great suggestions or recommendations, list them below or forever hold your oversized stomach.

 

Responses to this drivel: 59 Comments
27
Feb

Be the first to try Go-To!

Posted by / Beauty, Skin

As I mentioned last month, I wish for nothing more than to bathe in a tub of pure golden fairy floss each night before bed.

Actually, there is one more thing I wish for: that my loyal and lovely fruits are the first to sample my skin care line, Go-To!

I wish for this because since 2006 you have provided me with comments, questions and feedback on beauty, and so much of that amazing intel formed the foundation of this range, and the reason I created it at all.

You were confused about what to use on your skin so I made it uncomplicated!

You were annoyed at products that didn’t deliver, so I made sure my products were effective!

You were pissed off with nasties in your skin care, so I left every single one of them on the curb, crying for their mama!

You already have products you love and want to keep using, so Go-To slots in easily around them!

So, let’s get you using them, and before anyone else, care of the fruitybeauty/Go-To PRE-SALE EXTRAVAGANZA!!!!

That’s right viewers, from 10am Tuesday March 4 until 10am Thursday March 6, there will be a limited amount of select Go-To products that you can purchase, direct from the wonderful Go-To website, which is the the exclusive stockist of Go-To.

I am making it limited – in terms of stock, and the type of products available – because while I want you rascals to be able to try Go-To first, I still very much wish for April 1 to be the big, exciting, mega launch day. I guess you can think of the pre-sale as part sneak peek, part tease and part fodder for bragging rights to your mates, because we will be shipping you your first taste of Go-To the week before it goes on sale officially.

Real important things about the fruity/Go-To pre-sale extravaganza:

1. Wearing underpants is important, no matter what you hear.

2. While we do have limited stock allocated for this pre-order fun fest, we will be releasing that stock in bursts over the pre-sale period. This means that if you come to the site on Wednesday morning, instead of smack on 10am Tuesday, there will still be products available to purchase. This A) prevents a site meltdown, B) prevents a Zoe meltdown when the site melts down and C) and makes it all a bit more fair.

3. There are a total of five Go-To skin care products in the range. I will be releasing three of these for pre-sale, which you can read about in full glorious detail on the site. Should you try to buy the two remaining prods that are being reserved for April 1, you will be politely but firmly denied.

3. We ship to Aus, NZ and internationally. So, uh, everywhere.

3. The full Go-To site won’t be going live until April 1, but we have created a special pre-sale version, just for the fruits, which is live only between that 10 AM Tues – 10AM Thurs period. The link for that special fruitybeauty version of the site will be posted here early next Tuesday morning.

4. You CAN pass on that link to friends, there’s no way I will know if you have because the government asked me to return all of my surveillance cameras, but the more we just keep this whole affair something special just for the loyal fruits who read this blog, the better, I reckon… (Also, more chance of you getting some product, over ‘them’.)

5. Any questions? Comment below and I will clarify.

Guys, this is all TREMENDOUSLY exciting.

That sentence deserves way more of these: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 Go-To skin care logo

 Also, I hopefully will be seeing a cute bunch of you on my book tour for The Wrong Girl this and next week! What a blast.

 

 

Responses to this drivel: 40 Comments
13
Feb

Is your shampoo too heavy for your hair?

Posted by / Beauty, Hair

It might be, you know.

Your hair might not even be fine, it just might be that a specific product is too weighty for you. (Same thing can happen with mascara. If you get drop down every day, switch to a lighter formula… curling or lengthening over volume-boosting, say.)

Often the reason for heaviness comes down to ingredients designed to do things like nourish dry hair, tame curls, or get rid of frizz. If you’ve ever used a deep conditioning mask for example, and then felt like your hair was lank and kind of dirty even though you’d just washed it, you know what I’m talking/writing about.

Oils (especially almond oil which slips into a lot of shampoo and conditioner these days, even Head and Shoulders uses it now for nourishment) are often to blame, but many attribute silicones as the culprit of this heaviness, although as a lass with REAL fine hair (in a literal sense, not a sassy street talking sense) but also hair that loves a frizz party, Silicones are a bloody dream for my hair. They give my hair obedience and make humidity buzz off. (Any fans of ye olde Frizz-Ease will know just how helpful silicones can be.)

Don’t be fooled into thinking silicones are The Bad Guys. Silicones are excellent for conditioning, thermal protection and the aforementioned frizz obedience, and as well as being in loads of shampoos and conditioners (supermarket and salon brands), are in a TONNE of styling products, from best-selling frizz tamers to smoothing and straightening balms to that Moroccan oil you love so much. (Look on the ingredients for those ending in ‘cone’ to see if you’re using silicones.)

My theory is use whatever you like, and your hair responds to. If that’s organic and sulphate free, great! Full of silicones, no problem! Expensive and salon only, terrific! Judging others on their hair care preference seems bizarre. We’re all just trying to snaffle a Good Hair Day and limit the time we spend styling our hair each time we wash it: AMIRITE?

As long as you use a clarifying shampoo once a week (we should ALL be doing this regardless – especially those of us who love a a bit of mousse, hairspray, sea salt spray, volume powder or dry shampoo etc) and a hair treatment that’s targeted to your hair’s needs, then there shouldn’t be any problems.

CURLS
My natural hair with no styling product, just Pantene Beautiful Lengths shampoo and conditioner.
See? See why I like it?? No frizz! Obedient curls!

One brand that’s copped a lot of stick for using silicones is Pantene. A brand I am a proud ambassador for, and a big fan of.  I like it because my hair behaves when I use Pantene. I have zero issue with their formulas, and knowing that I am likely to slap a styling product with silicones in it as soon as I dry my hair anyway, obviously don’t care about silicones in my shampoo and conditioners. I like the shine, I like the frizz fighting and detangling properties; it suits me just fine.

 That said, I’m not against having slightly more… weightless hair. And now that I live in Melbourne, not Sydney (or should that be… Frizzney?!) (Zzzzing!) I have way less need for frizz taming qualities. The 4o degree dry heat is foul, but at least it’s not muggy. So, maybe I can try something sans silicone, I think. Just for a change. (And it’s good to switch up every once in a while, even if you revert back to your favourite before long.)

In a move that is oddly in sync with my geographical movements, Pantene just created a shampoo that’s silicone-free (and paraben and dye free) called Ice Shine. It’s a very thorough, lightweight shampoo that removes dirt and oil and build-up from your hair and leaves zero residue. If you’re a fine-haired doll, you will likely enjoy the effect very much. (There is also a conditioner and a treatment – both paraben and dye free, although not silicone free.) I like it when I need volume in my hair, or am creating a blow dry I need to last for as long as possible. (Several months, ideally.)

FYI: I generally only ever condition the mid-lengths to ends – no need for conditioning the roots if you have fine hair, regardless of whether you’re engaging a silicone-based conditioner or not.

Pantene Ice Shine Shampoo - low res Pantene Ice Shine Conditioner - low res Pantene Ice Shine Rinse-Off Treatment (2)

Sound good? Do you want to try it?

(YES THAT’S THE SOUND OF A GIVEAWAY, SOMETHING I ALWAYS NEVER DO!)

Well you can. Pantene is so proud of Ice Shine’s fabulousness that they’ve given me 10 packs of Ice Shine to giveaway.

It’s real easy to win.

Follow @panteneANZ on Instagram and comment on their latest post featuring Ice Shine, telling us why you want to try it. The comp will be judged by myself and Pantene and entries close 9am Feb 17th.

Could not be more simple. And yes, emojis are welcome.

 

Responses to this drivel: 32 Comments
14
Jan

I’m launching my own skin care line.

Posted by / Beauty, Skin

I am!

I really, really am. And HOLY SHIT IT’S EXCITING. I am so thrilled to even be writing this (admittedly cryptic and annoying) post about it, such has the level of secrecy been thus far.

I’ve been working on the range since 2012, and I can say with absolute certainty that it is the finest skin care in the entire world, which might sound like an arrogant, unqualified and completely outrageous claim, but that’s only because it is an arrogant, unqualified and completely outrageous claim.

Still, it’s very, very lovely, and I am almost certain you will like it, because, well I kind of created it with you in mind.

You being all of the gorgeous, enthusiastic, curious, feedbacky fruits I’ve had the pleasure of writing for and interacting with since I became a beauty editor a decade ago. You’ve been so beautifully honest about what you like, what you don’t like, what you use, what you think you should be using, what you know you should be using, and most vitally, just how confusing you find skin care to be.

And I agree. It IS confusing. There are so many dingin’ products out there, and so many different steps, and so many avenues and options to pursue, and so many big sciencey words and terrifying potential skin issues, it’s no wonder so many of us:

– just stick to whatever we’ve always used in the hope it’s doing something/anything

– buy whatever is new and shiny and popular because the ads make it sound so rad

– copy whatever our mum/sister/friends use

– resort to rubbing peanut butter on our faces before bed.

And look, I’m the first in line to try products with dazzling claims and fancy new ingredients. That’s my job. BUT, ultimately, and I say this as someone who can literally choose to use any skin care product she desires, and has given very many of them a good whack over the years, (and will continue to) simplicity is the backbone of my skin care routine. (Also, I travel a lot and have got my basics down to a fine art.)

All I really use is:

A great cleanser.

Something with AHAs to exfoliate.

Moisturiser.

Lip balm.

A physical sunscreen.

Targeted serums.

Stuff to keep the skin on my body nice.

And so I wondered…. would it be the craziest thing in the world to make a tight edit of really very useful, incredibly simple, extremely natural but very effective skin care products that combined my years of experience testing and using a wide range of them, with the ingredients I know work, with my desire for simplicity and my firsthand understanding of what women actually want (and need, whether they know it or not) from their skin care? And – gasp – make it all a bit fun, too?

No. It would not be the craziest thing in the world. (That would be smoking on a commercial airliner while announcing loudly that you are messenger from out of space here to expertly cull the population using planes as your weapon and caramel sauce as your sustenance.)

That said, it has been a BIG BIG undertaking. I now get why not many people start their own skin care lines. It’s hard. Stressful. Challenging. And even though I have an exceptional team around me, including overwhelmingly valuable guidance from my dear friend, Megan Larsen, founder of  superb organic skin care brand (and personal favourite) Sodashi, it’s been a huge, wild learning curve, one not helped by my insane levels of fussiness and perfectionism and endless demands of my brilliant biochemist for ‘less ingredient X’ and ‘half of a whisper more of ingredient Y,’ and questions regarding making something ‘less grabby but not too slippy, you know?’

Zoe Foster Blake Skin Care Samples
Some of my many many samples…

Here’s an example: This is VERSION 16 of my lip balm. And that’s not even the final one. No surprises there, though, you guys know how fucking pedantic I am about lip balm. Always have been. Never quite found the perfect one. So, if I am making my own, guess where all of that pedantic fury is going to be funnelled?

Zoe Foster Blake Skin Care Versions 2
Version 16. The almost final product. 

To say that I am impressed with this particular product is a violent and spectacular understatement. I don’t want to talk it up too much, but actually, wait a second, yes I do. It’s excellent. It is! Am I allowed to say that? Who cares. As you can imagine, it’s stupidly exciting finally getting the products to look, feel, smell and act just as I imagined them to, and use them and love them, and just be disgustingly proud of them like a gross stage mum. 

You cannot know how excited I am for you all to try them.

Speaking of which, this post is obviously just a frustrating teaser, but the range will officially launch April 1. (Yes, on April fools day. You know me).

Well before then, though, I will of course give you all the proper details about the range like, oh I don’t know, the name maybe? And the product breakdown, what they do, the long list of nasties we left out, the cool shit we definitely didn’t leave out, what they look like, smell like, where they like to eat lunch, where they were made, and where you can buy them.

AND! Hold on to your hand creams, because in February I am doing a special pre-order campaign just for my faithful fruits. Of course I am! You helped create the range, it’s only fair you get your silky paws on it first.

Yours in giddiness and perfectly nourished lips,

Zo

 

Responses to this drivel: 174 Comments

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