Fruits, hello!

I hope you're all exceptionally well and watching Mad Men and embracing matte pink lipstick. Because that's what an awesome person would do.Watch Mad Men. And wear lipstick. But maybe not if they're a man.

Thought it was time I delivered some fruitastical updates.

1. I bought a delightful blue vase from a garage sale today. It's a real winner.

2. I now have a fortnightly column in The Sunday Telegraph. It is on arts and crafts, and more specifically woodwork. Ha! As if. Everyone knows metal work is far more exciting. But seriously, it is, of course, on beauty. You should read it. All the time.

3. I also write a monthly dating article in Cosmopolitan magazine. This might be why men are not lining up to date me. That or my habit of placing large announcements with both our photos saying: Guess who is an item!! in the newspaper after one date.

4. My next two books are officially in the can. It is a very large can, like one of those novelty ones you can buy at the Royal Easter Show. The next one, which is non-fiction, is on sale October, and the next novel is out early 2010. Which sounds like a made up year from an episode of The Jetsons but is actually only eight months away.

5. Meowbert has been reading through some scripts and will be announcing a major movie role very soon. I don't want to say too much, but think Speed meets Notting Hill.

6. I am a twit. (Not really news, but at least now it's official.) Follow me at www.twitter.com/zotheysay

9. I still don't know how to count.

Love,
Fruitasaurus Rex X

Ps Yes PRIMPED gets all my love and time now, but remember: She's not the enemy.
She is the natural evolution of fruitybeauty. Just like Caramello Koala
was the natural evolution of caramel. Just in case you've never been
onto PRIMPED, (ha! as if) here is my daily blog,
which even has the same style heading as fruitybeauty, which should
indicate to you that it is 100% the same blog, by the same nutbag. Just
in a different pair of pants.