You are very good to fruity, you are.

My hits are growing like some form of demonic bacteria, which is TERRIFIC, and I THANK YOU because it is DEFINITELY EXCELLENT… except that you lot get very cranky if the fruit bowl is not re-stocked daily, which simultaneously makes me giddy (I am literally dripping with gid) but it also makes me panic mildly at around 3.23am if I haven’t posted a fresh rant for the next morning. But that’s not your problem. Your problem is that you are potentially missing crucial beauty information.

Which brings me to the point of this post, which, like my new sunglasses, I seem to have misplaced:

No, no, here it is. Found it.

Subscribe!
It’s fun!
It’s easy!
It’s free!

And it means you’ll never miss a post, ’cause they will now get dribbled directly into your inbox, (just after that email from your boss about how you spend too much time on the internet, and also, if you don’t delete iTunes from your PC immediately, IT will kindly remove it for you.)

After all, the one day you don’t hit fruitybeauty could be the day I write about your biggest and most irritating beauty issue. (Hairy toes.) Or, flipping the script, a product from your beauty stable. (Toe-hair remover.)

How to subscribe:

See that button to the left of the words you’re currently reading, that says ‘Subscribe’? Ignore it. Means nothing.

Of course, I jest. It means EVERYTHING.

Above that is a box where you place your email address. Please do that, and then hit our little subscribey buttony friend.

Now magical computery things will happen, of which no one understands, or needs to, because the bottom line is you will now have fresh fruit delivered to you daily.

*Applause*